Curse you Chic-Fil-A

April 21, 2008

As I posted on Friday, I enjoyed a chicken biscuit at Mickey D’s which was reminiscent of the breakfast sandwiches at Chic-Fil-A.  A friend posted a comment that there was in fact a franchise here in the city.  Another comment from a fellow chic-thusiast revealed it was true.  Unfortunately the fil-a-locator comes with a caveat.  It states, “This unit my have restricted access to the public.”  See… it’s inside an NYU dining hall.  So now if need my chic-fil-a-fix, I have to enroll in NYU classes?  Am I expected to stand outside in a trench coat like an addict, offering students money, and/or sexual acts just to go in and buy me a delicious chicken sandwich and a large waffle fry?  Bastards!

As far as my weekend went… saw Forgetting Sarah Marshall… loved it… my roomie summed it up best, “it was everything I wanted Knocked Up to be.”  Exactly.  Worked an awfully boring event on Saturday… it was a little bit of extra scratch which is always a blessing, but unfortunately it made me completely unavailable for the bachelor party I was supposed to attend.  I’m sure it will be horrible but I’m afraid I will have to take the groom out for a second mini-bachelor-party.  I did an improv show last night, and had a surprisingly decent crowd for a Sunday.  I’m doing another one again tonight, though I may only be doing tech, but considering the rate that my castmates are falling victim to a flu bug… I may wind up jumping into the show.  We shall see.

I’m going to kick today off with a video from a relationship website… if only because my roommate is in said video. Nothing wrong with shameless promotion of one’s friends:

If you work at a company where your boss would have any reason to say this phrase, “We’re not the mean waterboarding company that people think we are,” it’s time to start sending out resumes:

Team-building through torture

Ok… it’s a Monday… some of us need something naughty to look at… more importantly I’m going to conduct my own experiment… you see wordpress has this awesome feature that will show you exactly what people typed into google to find your blog. This is based mostly on the ‘tags’ and for the most part I get hits from odd things like, “country girl freeman.” But I get a significant boost whenever I tag things like “naked asians,” or “rockstar nude scenes.” Yes, the internet is for porn… we know that… but this experiment is so much more. I’m going to tag each of the Baywatch babes individually along with the word topless and we’ll see how many hits I get per name… place your bets now:

10 Best Baywatch stars topless scenes

I know how this guy feels… sometimes mall bathrooms can just be disgusting, why bother going into one at all when you can just…:

Take a dump in a potted plant… in the middle of the mall

Now I don’t know much about coaching a baseball team… but I would’ve pulled my pitcher long before it became a concern over, “protecting his pitching arm.” Much less would I call it a pitching arm:

66 runs in less than 2 innings

One technique is all I ever really needed… I didn’t think it was complicated. It’s not a chili recipe… I thought everyone kinda did it the same way. I am absolutely shocked to find there are more ways to do it:

Top 5 masturbation techniques

Nor did I know there were so many euphemisms for the above process:

Consulting with your silent partner

I’m a day late for all you 420 celebrators… but frankly if you celebrated the day yesterday, you’re probably not sure what day it is today:

Inventive and Unique bongs (for tobacco use only)

Apologies to non-gamers… not that I’m a gamer… but you know… some people enjoy this sort of thing…:

Best video game story lines ever

This really is more of a Friday video but… I couldn’t wait to share this one… it brings me such joy. A little after the 3 minute mark it gets even more uncomfortable… if you can fathom that… this may be the greatest piece of cinema about an elderly phone sex worker ever… it’s probably the only piece of cinema, but I don’t think anyone can ever top this:

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2 Responses to “Curse you Chic-Fil-A”

  1. Tim said

    did you call that chick-fil-a? It’s possible the “restricted access” simply refers to the Sunday closures… (i know. i’m grasping at strips. STRAWS. I meant straws.)

  2. Tim said

    I found the masturbation post very insightful. And hot. Readers may also be interested in taking it one step further:

    http://mastechnique.blogspot.com/

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