Dark Knight has broken every record for anything ever, I think it even shattered the long standing record for long jump.  198 million dollars its first week… and I still haven’t seen the damn thing!!!  My friend Tim sent me a text message that simply said, “OMFG OMFG OMFG Batman OMFG.”  For the uneducated OMFG stands for OH MY F*cking God!  I’ve been way too busy.  I’m leaving for a work in a few minutes, after that, my Uncle is in town so I’m doing dinner with him, then it’s my friend Travis’ birthday so I’m stopping to have a drink with him after dinner.  Then i have to wake up at 6am tomorrow to go do a show in New Jersey.  I should be back to the city by 1pm… which means… Batman.  Then I HAVE to do laundry… oh that also means I may not post something tomorrow.  Sorry… I am only human.

It’s sad really, we shouldn’t glorify this Batman character, it’s bad for our children:

10 Mental illnesses Batman definitely has

I miss Highlights Magazine… I used to have a subscription and would read ever issue from front to back, even as a teenager it was the most comforting thing in the doctor’s waiting room.  This would be less so:

Highlights for Children… by Satan

I lose sleep about these people sometimes… it’s good to know some of them are doing well:

Where are they now?  Unfortunate internet celebrities

I feel for advice columnists, I can’t say anything about this question other than just giving you the title:

My wife left me when the dolphins at Sea World gave me an erection

There’s nothing that brings more more insight into why children today are so messed up and addicted to Ritalin and speak in slang than seeing how they’re being warped as infants:

20 products to traumatize your infants

I’ll admit the only reason I moved to New York in the first place was for the great public access cable shows…

Stripper karaoke